I Empower Women to Heal The Wounds They Were Never Able To Name and To Find The Inner Peace That Has Been Waiting On The Other Side Of Their Deepest Silence.
Welcome to The Peace Lounge, a place for the woman who is exhausted by her own life and who gives everything, carries everything, and wonders why the peace she keeps reaching for never quite arrives.
You are in the right place.
How Are You, Really? A Daily Practice of Self-Check-In and Inner Peace
“How are you?”
It’s a question we’ve grown very accustomed to. We ask it in passing, out of politeness, routine, or casual courtesy. Sometimes it’s asked with sincere concern, and other times it’s simply a social formality of words exchanged without much thought.
We are used to others asking us how we are.
But when was the last time you stopped and asked yourself that same question?
The Question We Rarely Ask Ourselves
Recently, it occurred to me just how little time we take to truly check in with ourselves. We move through our days responding to external demands, responsibilities, and expectations, often without pausing to notice what is happening within us.
If nobody shows concern for our inner world, we are left reeling silently on the inside, without acknowledgment, without care, and without consideration for our state of mind or our inner peace.
And yet, we wait.
We wait for someone else to ask. We wait for someone else to notice. We wait for someone else to care.
It’s Time to Show Ourselves Care and Consideration
It’s time we begin to show more care, concern, and consideration for ourselves, starting with one simple question:
How are you?
Not once in a while. Not only when things fall apart. But daily. Preferably, several times a day.
When you ask yourself this question, you interrupt autopilot. You pause long enough to become present with yourself rather than lost in everything around you.
What Happens When You Ask Yourself “How Am I?”
When you ask yourself, How are you?, you give yourself permission to:
Become present in the moment
Assess your current state of mind
Feel your body instead of ignoring it
Acknowledge your emotions without judgment
Notice whether you are calm, tense, scattered, or at peace
This simple check-in reconnects you to yourself. It brings awareness where there may have been avoidance. It creates space where there may have been overwhelm.
Awareness Creates the Opportunity for Realignment
Once you can answer that question honestly without rushing, minimizing, or pretending you place yourself in a better position to respond with care.
From that awareness, you can:
Calm yourself down
Relax your nervous system
Pause before reacting
Realign with your intention to remain in peace
Return to higher, more grounded emotional states
You cannot realign what you refuse to acknowledge. Awareness is the doorway back to inner balance.
Don’t Wait for the World to Ask You
Get into the habit of asking yourself, How are you?
Don’t wait for others to ask. Don’t wait for validation. Don’t wait until your inner calm has completely unraveled.
The sooner you check in, the easier it becomes to course-correct before stress, frustration, or emotional overload takes over.
This practice allows you to gently bring yourself back on track again and again.
Asking Yourself “How Are You?” Is an Act of Self-Love
Asking yourself how you are is not selfish. It is not indulgent. It is not unnecessary.
It is an act of self-love. It is a form of self-care. It is a commitment to honoring your inner peace.
When you make this a daily practice, you begin to cultivate a deeper relationship with yourself, one rooted in awareness, compassion, and presence.
And that relationship becomes the foundation for a calmer, more aligned, and more peaceful life.
Take a moment today and ask yourself: How am I?
Thank you for spending some time in reading and reflecting.
You can begin your peace journey today by downloading my free eBook: 5 Days to Inner Peace here.
Shaffa is the author of The Feeling You Cannot Admit, the first book to name the feeling no parent has ever been allowed to admit. She is a writer, coach, teacher, and speaker. Her work sits at the intersection of psychology, spirituality, and the lived experience of women.
Blessings, Peace & Love to You!
Are You Carrying a Feeling You Have Never Been Able to Name?
The Feeling Identifier is a free discovery reflection designed specifically for the parent who cannot love freely. Move through nine honest questions and discover six truths about what you have been carrying that most parents never get to hear.
No judgment. No pressure. Just the truth, finally named.
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